Since everyone is being incredibly emo today, about it being #blackTuesday in South Africa —– are you ready for a giggle? Today I’m talking about BOOOBIES, HOOTERS, TATAS, “THE GIRLS”, TITTIES, JUGS…. The things that men go crazy for!! But specificially talking about the biggest ones which are shoved in her face thanks to the media.
I do not have big boobies, I am thankful for it after seeing how some family members have struggled with various problems due to large breasts, and I do not want massive ones either. However, there are some ridiculously big ones around nowadays. How do these women find underwear that fits? How do they stand upright? How do they hug their partners?
Bras have a terrible life… They seldom stay on and when they come off, no one cares what happens to them. They have a shelf life of 2 years and there always seems to be a newer, thinner, better versions coming out. Even so, some of the most beautiful women in our media have good reason to purchase many more bras since the ones they use now barely contain “the girls”.
So here’s the full rundown of the hardest working bras in the media ranked from smallest cup size to largest. Check out my running commentory below.
KATIE PRICE AKA JORDON
I know, LOOK AT THOSE THINGS. That is a picture before she got them reduced.
Everyone seems to forget she has them because she has morals and generally keeps her clothes on…
Ah, who said I’d only mention young, modern day people in the spot light?
This young lady was told she was “too tall” and “too beautiful” for Hollywood. HA! Her Maxim pictorials will go down as the HOTTEST in the magazines history. Eat that, HOLLYWOOD.
Another blast from the past. We, at Pout Perfection give credit to woman of all ages here and although we weren’t around for Ann’s heydey, we give credit to what GILF she made in the movie Grumpy Old Men. You go girl.
She was nominated for an Emmy and 4 Golden Globes. Insert joke about her having Golden Globes here. Here’s a fun fact: She’s Angelina Jolie’s godmother. Where’s Angie on this list? Chick’s only got a C-cup. PASS!
We’re not huge Star Trek fans here at Pout Perfection, but those D-cup phasers are set to stun. Better beam our men’s eyes up before they get slapped!
This beauty came to stardom and everyone saw them tatas in American Pie. I’m sure she made a lot of teengage boys lives with that film!
This tall Canadian drink of water was Miss November 1981 and Playmate of the Year in 1982. She went on to stare in many adult movies before marrying Kiss lead singer Gene Simmons and starring on Family Jewels. What a character!
Did you watch 1000BC? If you didn’t, you didn’t miss out on apart from them bazingas!
Her boobies first burst onto the scene in 40 year old virgin. Her whiny, cynical behavior was forgiven by any man watching for a sight of her cleavage. She still hasn’t shown off the curves yet. Unless you count the nude pics she leaked – why do celebs do that?
Tom Cruise’s ex-wife? Yeah, forgot about that, didn’t we? If she still doesn’t ring a bell, she played Elizabeth Hurley’s mom in Austin Powers. The thing about huge natural boobs is they have tendency to hit the floor as the time goes on. I’d still pay money to watch them clap, wakakakaka! Hilarious.
Who is she? She is a British bombshell from the UK’s version of Big Brother. So why include her in a list for the hardest working bras? Because those things could knock you out. You have be warned.
KIM *cough* KARDASHIAN
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, we don’t like her, we want to thow rotten fruit at her. Can’t argue with her curves, though.
No doubt about it, she’s better known for taking purdy pics, but she’s done a fair amount of acting, most notably her lead role in Piranha 3-D. Shoulda been called “Piranha 34-DD”.
She’s a singer – in case you live under a rock! Some would say pregnancy does a chest good, others say enhanced. What do you say?
Jessica Simpson can be thick, skinny, bald, or fat. The only difference is how the media depicts her. That aside, she has always had massive bazingas. She says, she got them from her momma.
Most men have to wonder how Ryan Reynolds could have divorced this woman, in my opinion she is the personification of the word SEXY.
That kid on Modern Family must have the most swollen blue balls known to man to have these shoved in his face all day on set… stop hating him boys, ha ha.
NICOLE ‘COCO’ AUSTIN
Yes, I have no idea who she is either, but god damn! Those are massive.
Even after 243 surgeries on her already rocking body, Heidi Montag is full of fakeness and yet somehow is does not bother us. Real or Fake, boobies are still boobies for the sake of this post!!
Good lord, how does she stand upright? Shame, god bless her back.
I hope none of you are jealous of these ladies with well looked after twins, remember to look after your own.
Be good! Or else you will be censored by the goverment and jailed for 25 years….